A Special Christmas Gram

The Ninth Day of Kindergarten

On Wednesday (aka, the 9th day of Kindergarten), I went to pick up Adam and Walt, as I had the previous eight days. When I got there, Ms. Malland, his teacher, came up to me and said, "We had an incident today at recess." Apparently a boy named Ethan and Adam's friend Maddux were having some sort of confrontation, and so Adam got involved and punched Ethan. Ms. Malland didn't see it happen but heard from another teacher. She said that the rule at recess is No Touching. Adam had to go to timeout, but everything was fine after that.

Adam told Mandy and I that he didn't hit Ethan, but we figured that he probably did, especially since I had just watched part of Karate Kid with him a few nights earlier (dad of the year). He also said that Ethan was being mean to Maddux. The good news is that it gave Adam and I a chance to talk about sin and forgiveness.

The other good news was that no punches were thrown yesterday. However, last night at dinner Mandy revealed more of the story. Maddux's mom emailed her yesterday and explained that Maddux is a hugger - a hugger who doesn't like to let go. So he was hugging Ethan on Wednesday and Ethan didn't really like it. Ethan was trying to get out of the hug. Adam saw this and interpreted it as his buddy Maddux being in trouble. And Adam stepped in.

So...poor Ethan got it on both ends - from the hugger and the puncher. We explained this all to Adam, which he thought was rather humorous. We also told him that no more punches need to be thrown at recess, but especially not until all the facts are known (alright, I didn't say that part).

A Whirlwind of Change

The last few weeks have been full of change for the Grisham family. I began my real estate classes at the beginning of July, and passed my exam a little over a week ago. Some have asked why I'm going into real estate. The answer is that I've actually been in real estate for a few years now. A year after moving to Memphis I started working in the mortgage industry. Unfortunately, just as I was getting going the housing industry was falling apart, so I got out of it. Through that, though, I caught the real estate bug, and I've been dabbling in it since that time. So it just made sense to make it a little more official and go ahead and get licensed. I hope to help my friends (and friends of my friends) buy or sell their homes, but I also plan to get more involved in the investment side of real estate. As soon as all of the paperwork goes through (a week or so), I'll begin working with Revid Realty here in Midtown.

As if that were not enough to write about, here are a few more changes. First, Mandy has gone back to teaching. We were planning on her taking one more year away from the classroom, but a job opened up at Vollentine Elementary School, which is located in the northern part of Midtown. My friend Matthew Watson is helping his church, Living Hope, plant a church in that neighborhood, and they are already official adopters of this school. God has opened several doors that have led us to take this step.

This meant that we had to find a place for Micah. Adam is starting Kindergarten next week (another BIG change), but we now needed daycare for Micah. My mom will be with him one day a week, I'll be with him another, and three days a week he'll be at Union Avenue's daycare, which, if you didn't know, is located one floor down from my office. They gave us an amazing discount, which is the only way we would have been able to enroll him there. Yet another door opened by God.

These are the stories we mustn't forget. We have to tell them to our children. We have to remind them that God is active in our lives, that He has plans for us, and when we are faithful to take them, He guides and directs our steps. After all, He is quite good at opening doors that seem to be closed!

This is a difficult transition for Mandy. She is going to miss being at home with the boys. We know that they are going to do great in school, but it's going to be hard for her. She has also been doing so much with NC and with the Peabody movement. Many of those roles are going to transition to others.

I am definitely a glass half-full kind of guy, but I know that this is going to be tricky in a lot of ways. I know that God is going to help us, and I believe that our times together as a family will be even richer.

A Budding Entrepreneur

Quote from Adam this morning:

Dad, do you think you could give me fifty dollars if I make my bed?

Fireworks

On Saturday night we went to Collierville to eat BBQ and watch the fireworks show with Dad & Co. As soon as the first rocket was launched, Adam was ready to leave. It was too loud for him, and he immediately began crying. Mandy ended up taking him farther away from the action. Micah wasn't too sure what to think, but as soon as it started he wanted out of his stroller and into my lap.

As I watched the spectacle, I couldn't help but think back to what our 4th of July fireworks celebrations commemorate: Real rockets. Real bombs. Real fire. Real war. I then started thinking about Francis Scott Key and the events that inspired the composition of "The Star Spangled Banner." Remember that? And while I was extremely grateful for the sacrifices that have been made whereby we are a free nation, it also hit me that perhaps my son's reaction to what was going on was the most authentic. Go figure.

Adam's Three Wishes

Mandy just called me. She was going through some papers and found a paper that Adam brought home a few weeks ago. Below is what she found.

If I could have three wishes that would come true, they would be:

1. To be at the beach forever
2. To have my dog back
3. To eat right now

Parenting can be such a challenge. Our newest challenge is the word "No." Micah has recently learned this word, and I must say that it's pretty hilarious. He doesn't know many words, but this one is up there on his favorites, right after Momma and Daddy. Last night he and I were outside, and I asked him if he was ready to go back inside. His response was no. I then asked him if he wanted to stay outside and play. His response once again was no. He's learning how to communicate, and right now it's very cute, very charming.

Now Adam, on the other hand...

Last night I told him it was time to go to bed, and he said, "No." This is the second time he's done this. The first time was Sunday night. This was neither cute nor charming. I told him that this was disobedience, and it was not acceptable. His punishment was that he couldn't watch tv this morning before school. He cried and tried to tell me that he was sorry and he wouldn't do it again, but I had to insist on the discipline. Our bedtime routine of talking, praying and singing lasted a little longer than normal. We talked about why it's important for him to obey us, as well as what God thinks about it. I made sure that he knows that I love him, and then he went to bed.

Now here's my dilemma. I don't want to create a double standard. It's not fair for Adam to get punished for saying something that gets a laugh when Micah says it. Now granted, the attitude (the heart) is the core issue here, and for Micah it's different than for Adam. However, I want to be consistent for Adam's sake.

Now for the even bigger dilemma: What about my obedience to my Father? What about when I say "No" to God? May my heart be sensitive to the Spirit's direction today. May I be quick to respond in obedience in whatever my Father says to me today. And I pray that my sons will come to know that I am this kind of man.

A plug for my favorite new blog...

Link

Hint: it features my eldest child

A New Blog

We have a carpool with Josh and Ginger Spickler on days that Walt and Adam have CLUE at Downtown Elementary School. Josh has started a blog documenting the strange and amusing conversations that go on in the backseat during those drives. If you need a laugh, check it out. I promise that it will not let you down.

Adam's Letter to Santa

Left beside a plate of cookies and milk (and carrots for the reindeer), here's Adam's letter to Santa:

Dear Santa, I want you to have these cookies because I love you. Adam

Merry Christmas!!!

Generous...for a 4-yr old

A few weeks ago I spoke on the subject of generosity at Neighborhood Church. I so wish that I had had this story to share then.

Adam's weekly chore is to empty all of the small trash cans into the large trash cans. He enjoys doing this, especially since he gets paid. Tonight I decided to give him a big raise. Instead of one penny per trash can, I threw in a few quarters, nickels and dimes. He told me that he was going to give all of the money to his friend Walt, so that he could buy something nice on his birthday. Apparently he doesn't think Walt's parents are going to come through this year.

I decided that I shouldn't dissuade this, but I did make sure that this is what he wanted to do with his money. He assured me that he did. A short while later we had our community group over, so he kind of forgot about the money. Then, when he was getting ready for bed, he discovered that Mandy had put the money in his bank. He was worried that he wouldn't know what was for Walt. I reminded him what I had given him, and then he asked, "How will I know which dime is the right one?" I explained that all dimes are the same. They're all worth 10 cents, and they'll all buy you a piece of gum.

All of a sudden you could see the brain churning, and then the priceless response: "I was just tricking you earlier about giving that money to Walt."

Male Model in the House

No, Derek Zoolander has not moved in. It's my firstborn, Adam. Kristi Vickers of BluOrchard Photography and Neighborhood Church asked Adam to model for her this morning. It's for a charity event she has planned for Christmas. Apparently it went well. Hopefully it won't go to his head. But if it does, perhaps he will at least become philanthropic like Zoolander, and build centers for children who can't read good and wanna learn to do other stuff good too. I'm just sayin.

A Mom and Her Boys

Mandy has written some wonderful things about our sons, Adam and Micah.

New School for Adam

For the last few weeks Adam has been going to a preschool in our neighborhood. We were very excited when this door came open, and really wanted it to work. Unfortunately, it didn't, and so on Wednesday Adam started at a new school. Today I got to go with him. It was Daddy Donut Day, or at least that's what I called it. I got to meet some of Adam's friends, and their Dad's, and got to enjoy some yummy donut holes in the process. Definitely a good start to the day!

Reflections from the Beach

Last night we returned from three nights at Orange Beach. It was so good for the four of us to get away and have fun together. Mandy and I knew it would be challenging with with both boys and no other adults (as there has been during other vacations), so we did some pretty intentional planning. We left our house on Monday morning at 4:30 am. This meant that the boys slept quite a bit, but it also meant that we had several hours on the beach that first day.

We also decided that we would feed the boys first, then I would pick up takeout (seafood) and we would enjoy a nice dinner on the balcony after they were asleep. I must say that this was Mandy's idea, and what a wonderful idea it was. It was a great time of reconnecting for the two of us.

One story to share...on the first morning Adam and I went out for a walk on the beach. As we were walking back towards our condo, a jogger came up behind us and passed us. Apparently Adam saw this as a gesture to race, so off he went (picture Forrest Gump). The funniest part was that as soon as he passed him, he cut him off, then went to play in the sand. I'm sure the guy's response was, "Are you kidding me?" By this point I had stopped and was just laughing.

Alright, one more story about the 4-year old. If you've ever spent any time with Adam, you know that he's the extrovert of the family. Mom, Dad and Micah are all pretty boring to him, so he wanted to find friends. I love the fact that he's not afraid to go up to someone and begin talking. I sometimes worry that this is going to lead to heartbreak from time to time, but I love that he has that within him. Here's the funny part. Yesterday morning we went out to the beach one last time before leaving. I was sitting down watching Adam and Micah play in the sand. Two ladies walked by, and one of them said, "Hi Adam." She kept walking. It took me awhile to remember that Adam had met her when he went to play with her sons on our first day there. I laughed, wondering how many others knew Adam.

Adam and Walt

Last night Walt came over while his parents went out. They were going to be late, so we called it a partial sleep-over. We made them go to bed around 8:30, and they talked for quite awhile. I think it was around 9:30 before they were completely quiet. At one point Mandy and I listened in on their conversation. Here's a portion of it.

Walt: I'm going to St. Louis to a baseball game. I'm also going to a museum.

Adam: What kind of museum?

Walt: I don't know

Adam: Is it a museum for dinosaurs?

Walt: I don't know

Adam: Is it a museum for construction vehicles?

Walt: I don't know

Adam: Is it a museum for helicopters?

Walt: I don't know

Adam (getting quite agitated): Walt, can you tell me what kind of museum it is?

Walt: I don't know

Next time Walt comes over, we're hiding a recorder.

Worried About Michael

Mandy relayed this story to me today.

Adam has been keeping up with the Michael Jackson story. Today he told my mom that Michael Jackson burned himself (happened in 1984 I believe). Then he said, "Now he's in the ground, and I'm very worried."

Public School Closer to a Reality

I first wrote a post on our thoughts regarding public education in Memphis around a year and a half ago. Since that time we've continued the conversation with so many others about what it would look like for more people from our neighborhood to send our kids to our neighborhood elementary school (Peabody Elementary School).

It's hard to believe that Adam will be starting Pre-K next year. A few months ago we decided that we would like for Adam to go to Peabody's Pre-K program. We realized that we met the income requirements, so we began pursuing it. Last week we found out that 29 students tested lower than him, which means that he is 9th on the waiting list. We were a little disappointed, but knew that if God had other plans for Adam, that was what we wanted. So we began looking for Plan B. Mandy called several private pre-k programs. A few still had available slots.

We then found out that the principal at Peabody was referring familes who didn't get into the their Pre-K to Red Robin Academy, which is located in First Congregational Church here in Cooper-Young. So this morning Mandy and I met with Robin Mayweather, the founder and director of the academy. Right before pulling up, Mandy made the comment that we were going to have to figure out how much we could spend for Adam's education this year (part of the draw to public education is that it's free).

We went on a tour, then talked with Mrs. Mayweather in her office. We asked several questions, and then Mandy asked her for a tuition schedule. She looked at us a little strange, then said that the Pre-K program is the same as the one at Peabody. Both are a part of Memphis City Schools. That is, they're both free! We just kind of looked at each other.

It looked a door had been closed; one that, at the time seemed like a real "God thing." And now a new door opens, one which has all of the same goals and values behind it. There are still some things that we are a little concerned about, but for the most part, it seems like God is in this. I love the idea of walking Adam to school and of being involved with the families of the school. It just seems to fit so much of what we are trying to do here in Cooper-Young.

Another NBA Draft with my boys

Last night the boys and I watched the NBA draft together. This marked Adam's first draft (here's his first) and it was Micah's first. As a side note, I thought the Griz did ok. I'm actually pretty happy with Thabeet, and I was really glad to see Tyreke go #4 to the Kings and Dozier with the last pick of the draft. But enough of that. Here are a few more pics.